I have forgotten how much I enjoyed drawing. My sister and I went to Daiso (a Japanese, $1.50-everything store) and I picked up a sketchbook and a brush pen. I was hoping to learn how to do calligraphy but once I tested out the pen (which is kind of a hybrid between a felt tip and a teensy-weensy brush), I just couldn’t wait to sketch.
When I was a kid, I grew up watching anime and I would draw them all the time. I remember making friends in elementary school because the other kids wanted me to teach them how to draw; it’s kind of funny to think about all of that now. I took an art class in middle school and another one in high school for fun. I didn’t think I was that great at it, but it was always something I enjoyed doing. Then I began to slowly drift away from it because I didn’t think I was talented. I got frustrated because I felt like I had no originality–that I lacked my own style. It somehow felt like I was just drawing things that I saw. Do you know that feeling? When it seems like somebody just pulls an idea out of their butt and it’s just wonderful and from then on, it feels harder for you to come up with something different? I began to overthink what I wanted to draw and it got really frustrating.
Over the years, my drawings began to be limited to biology-related pictures because that was the only way I learned in my classes….Then my course load increased and I didn’t have enough time to make visual guides anymore. Even the occasional doodling on the corner of my paper during class has dwindled down ever since I started using my laptop to take notes. I mean back in the days, when you zone off, you begin to doodle (or doodle THEN zone off, haha) but nowadays, that browser logo is only a click away! Now, the only time I do draw is when my niece asks me to draw with her.
Today, a pen and some pieces of paper has rekindled that fondness I have with drawing. I now realize that imitation of others’ work are like the training wheels until I develop my own style. I know now that even though I’m not naturally talented in this area, practice, imagination, and inspiration will always propel me to improve.